Overcoming Adversity

I am sharing my story because I want other adoptees to know that no matter how difficult a relationship is with your adoptive parents, they did want you, even if, they have a hard time showing it.

I was born in Dzerzhinsk, Russia.

In April 1996, a family from the U.S adopted me. I was only thirteen months old when I left everything behind.

Prior to being adopted, I was in an orphanage. Based on what I have been told, I entered the orphanage at six days old and remained there until my adoption.

I’ve also been told that my birth mother used to come to the orphanage; however, she only did that until I was six weeks old. I wish I knew more about her.

Living in an orphanage was difficult. Every day you would hear babies crying. In fact, that is all you ever heard.

Today, I deal with multiple challenges since being adopted.

I have a hard time accepting certain holidays including Mother's and Father's Day.

I am very fortunate to have two mothers and two fathers.

Once I was adopted, everything changed.

For the first ten years, I’ve been the only child. In the spring of 2006, my adoptive parents brought home another child. She was adopted from China.

I was excited.

As a family, we began to incorporate the Chinese culture into our lives. We spent each Chinese New Year at festivals, took Mandarin lessons, and much more.

I wish we did similar things to celebrate where I was from.

After a few years, things took a different turn. My adoptive parents started telling me that they wished they had brought home another girl instead of me.

It felt as if my closest support group had disappeared.

Over the years, I’ve dealt with multiple problems including anxiety, depression, and mood disorder.

In high school, I was continuously criticized to the point of harming myself.

I could not understand why someone who wanted me so badly would treat me with such hatred.

It was hard to find who I truly was.

Today, I am proud of the life I have created and the relationships I have built.

I'm proud that I am much more than what others thought I would be.